Whiney Post

When you are reading this, read it in a really whiney voice because that is how I feel as I am writing it! I am really really tired of spending my entire first trimester alone. John is out of town through the week and has been since the week before I found out I am pregnancy. The weekend before last I was out of town for a conference the whole weekend so I didnt get to see my husband for two weeks. The weekends are way too short, he usually doesnt feel like doing anything most of the weekend because he has been gone all week and I usually want to do something because I have been by myself all week.

I also work from home, so I dont even see people during the day while working. I spend all day and all night by myself and it gets pretty boring! It wouldnt be so bad if I was just spending evenings alone and I was around people all day at work. But I dont.

It also doesnt help that I have had morning sickness so bad that all I feel like doing is laying on the couch when I am not in the bathroom. But I am starting to feel better now, I think that is why it is getting to me more now.

Sorry to whine, normally I love working from home. Just not when John is out of town and I am alone all day and night.

Next post will be less blubbering!

Seriously!?!

So I posted about the hematoma on my myspace blog and a girl that is on there as a friend (actually, she is just someone I went to school with, we have never been friends, just acquaintances) replied to my post. She said that (my complications) is why she isnt sure if she wants kids, she is afraid that she will have complications because she has had FOUR abortions!!! Four! Come one, at what point do you learn your lesson and use some BIRTH CONTROL! She has been married for 10 years or something like that, all were with her husband, but really, quit being so selfish and take responsibility! I am pro-choice and think that everyone needs to choose for themselves, but I do have a problem when people use abortion as birth control. Isnt there a limit on that? She went on to say that "birth control just doesnt work for us" and "I am as fertile as it gets, it sucks". Well, regardless of how fertile she is, she can find some kind of birth control that works. And if ONE doesnt, then double up. Use the pill AND a condom or something. She has also commented before that she doesnt want to give up smoking pot for 9 months so she isnt sure if she wants to have kids. So my guess is, they get high and dont use birth control properly because they arent necessarily in their right mind. Voila! She gets pregnant, then just says "oh well, I'll have another abortion". How totally irresponsible! So many people want children SOOOO bad and arent fertile at all! She should be a little more responsible with her 'fertileness'.

Sorry this is such a rant, but that email just really pissed me off. Once your are in your 30's and get pregnant WITH your husband, I really think you need to quit being selfish and own up to your actions. Ok, I'm done venting.

Sub-Chorionic Hematoma

I had my first appointment yesterday with my OB. I started having some very slight spotting on Sunday and a little on Monday morning, and some of my other symptoms also eased up A LOT Monday and Tuesday so I was really worried about the baby. So I had an ultrasound to see how the baby was doing and to see why I was spotting. What a little peanut!! Hearing the heart beating was amazing! I started crying as soon as I heard it!

After seeing that the baby was doing great the ultrasound technician tried to find out the reason for the spotting. She found a sub-chorionic hematoma near the placenta. Apparently, it is bleeding and bruising. The ultrasound tech downplayed it and didnt seem to think it was a big deal but I didnt talk to my doc after the ultrasound so I dont know if it is a big deal or not. I did some research online and that scared me a bit! Most of what I read said that you should take it very easy to reduce the chance of miscarrying and most people end up on bedrest. I really hope that doesnt happen!!

So here are pictures of the ultrasound:

Feeling green

I havent posted in awhile. I havent done much of anything, actually! A few posts back I said I just want to 'feel' pregnant and followed that up with a comment on how I would be kicking myself for saying that. Well, I am kicking myself now! I have been soooo sick the past couple weeks. Nausea all. day. long! I dont vomit often I just feel like it all the time. I wish I would just throw up because I usually feel better afterwards. For a little while anyways.

So I now definitely feel pregnant. I will be 8 weeks tomorrow and I have almost every symptom the books list. I dont sleep very well, I am exhausted all the time, nausea that doesnt stop, and can we talk tender breasts!?! I didnt know they could hurt that bad! I bought a couple of sleep bras and those help a lot but they still hurt all night.

So the post about wanting to feel pregnant was stupid! I should have never wished that on myself (not that it would have changed anything if I didnt say that).

My husband is starting to realize that I really am pregnant. Not that he doubted it, it is just taking a little while for it to really sink in. We sat in front of the fireplace by the Christmas tree yesterday and I read some of the Fathers section out of the "what to expect..." book. He has been talking about it a lot more, too. He has always said he was excited (which I know he is) but it hasnt really sunk in until the past weekend. Maybe seeing his wife running to the bathroom and laying on the couch ready to throw up all the time is what did it! He is gone through the week and home on the weekends so he doesnt see me much lately. I think the 4 day weekend seeing me sick is what did it. We had more time to talk about the baby too.

My first appointment is a week from tomorrow. I am excited for that! Oh, I also found out today that one of my friends is pregnant and due two weeks after me! It will be fun to have someone else nearby at the same stage of pregnancy as me!